Emma Romano is a Self-healing Coach and Founder of HypnoSuccess.
Emma Romano is a living proof that you could take things into your own hands if you wanted to. I learned that she was diagnosed with MS in 2014 which lead her to have chronic fatigue and huge amount of constant fear and depression.
From there, she shared how she overcomes her illness and blockages in life and in turn living a life of health and happiness. Emma is such an inspiration. She inspires others and spread peace, self-healing and kindness. She also holds workshops and provides one on one service online. Her mission, passion and goal is to give people the tools to heal themselves in mind, body and spirit. Learn more about her in this interview!
Nick Abregu: Hey Google, who is the most legendary self-healing coach of all time? Emma Romano is.
Hey Google Voice: Here’s what I found.
Nick Abregu: Oh, here we go. It says Emma Romano,
Emma Romana: I told you.
Nick Abregu: Emma Romano, the self-healing coach. How are you?
Emma Romana: I’m so good Nick. How are you?
Nick Abregu: Good. It’s a bit warm today.
Emma Romana: Yeah, It’s a bit warm, It’s a bit smoky out there. But you know what? We are coping with it.
Nick Abregu: We are.
Emma Romana: Just. Can we tell them what we are doing right now? We actually have bags of ice on our feet.
Nick Abregu: And crutch.
Emma Romana: And crutch, that’s okay though. Yeah.
Nick Abregu: So, if you need rustling, that’s a…
Emma Romana: It’s tickling me. Fucking my leg.
Nick Abregu: I am gonna drink some of this.
Emma Romana: Yes! Kombucha.
Nick Abregu: Remedy, if you wanna sponsor us, you are more than welcome to. We have 20 million subscribers.
Emma Romana: Wow! That’s amazing.
Nick Abregu: The GorillaCo Podcast has 20 billion subscribers.
Emma Romana: Yeah. Emma Romana has a lot…
Nick Abregu: A hundred billion.
Emma Romana: A hundred billion subscribers.
Nick Abregu: Oh damn. That’s good.
Emma Romana: I feel the goodness in my body right.
Nick Abregu: Have you tried this before?
Emma Romana: Yeah, I love them.
Nick Abregu: Have you tried the blood orange.
Emma Romana: No.
Nick Abregu: It’s really good.
Emma Romana: Apple crisp is good.
Nick Abregu: Do you want some?
Emma Romana: Do you want to try the apple crisp?
Nick Abregu: I’ve had the apple crisp. I’m an expert in the apple crisp. We had Eric Chan from the Apple Crisp.
Emma Romana: Oh, that’s nice.
Nick Abregu: That’s good right?
Emma Romana: Oh, I like that. Thanks!
Nick Abregu: So, again. If you wanna sponsor us. You’re more than welcome to.
Emma Romana: You see how authentic that was, “that’s nice”. You have to see that.
Nick Abregu: So, just a bit background on what you do, and who you are.
Emma Romana: Okay. Emma Romano, I am the very proud wife of a beautiful man. And a very proud mama of two boys Jack and Ben who has just turned 18 and about 17.
Nick Abregu: And I’ve met one of them.
Emma Romana: You met Jack.
Nick Abregu: He’s a beautiful young man.
Emma Romana: He’s a great kid. And, although he is still 18. He is still an asshole but apart from that he’s a really great guy. He’s a kid, his job is to be an a***. Just like me. Doesn’t matter, he does actually look like me. I’m an a*** as well.
Nick Abregu: She’s not an asshole.
Emma Romana: I’m not an a***, I’m ugly. So, I am a really proud family person. But, apart from that, my career, my chosen career is to help people break through their shit and their blockages that stopping them from thriving. So, I’ve always been a tennis coach and a receptionist. And in 2014 something really massive happened to me that really kind of got me by the shoulders and shook me and said Emma wake the f*** up. And, I was actually diagnosed with MS, and it was pretty horrific because I went completely blind. Like, I am so emotional talking about it. But I love it, it’s a good thing.
Nick Abregu: And. These are… So, I remember that…
Emma Romana: Yeah.
Nick Abregu: We first encountered each other when we recorded, you’re
Emma Romana: Timeline Reset.
Nick Abregu: Timeline Reset Program?
Emma Romana: Yeah. Protocol yeah.
Nick Abregu: And, it got me emotional too.
Emma Romana: Yeah, you did. Thank you for that. I think it does to most people because, when you have such high value around family. And then you find that you can’t mother because I went blind in my left eye completely. And then I was literally given six months to be in a wheelchair. So, I went completely numb in my bodies of my right side my face, my chest, under my feet, my hands. I had… it’s kind of weird to explain. I had strength, I could hold things but I couldn’t feel them. So, if it wasn’t in… so my left eye was blind completely blind so if I had said my left hand it wasn’t my peripheral of my right hand I would forget it was then I would drop it.
Nick Abregu: And that was strange right?
Emma Romana: Yeah. Lots of things went drop while I would drop like cups, you know, at dinner there’s all kinds of things. And, there was one incident where I dropped probably one of the most precious things to me, and that was my 18-month-old niece there was two things that really made me. I move my ass and start looking at why my body had chosen a disease for me to heal and one of them was I dropped my nice. Thank God my husband’s a footy player and he just caught her. But it was actually on a concrete step. So, she just literally went through my hands I just didn’t feel her, and I think she was passed to me very quick. I don’t know what my body was doing, but it… she just fell, and thank God he caught her, and her head was literally inches from a concrete step.
Nick Abregu: Wow.
Emma Romana: So, she would have been really hurt from that. And, I think another really big turning point for me, it happened like a day or two before hand. This is back in 2014, my son Ben, he’s such a beautiful soul and he’d put his hand on my leg and goes, “Mommy I actually love music.” And I couldn’t believe that. Like what the f***. And he’s gone you’re still. All I ever wanted in my life was to have a family and I realize at that moment I had the family, had the most beautiful family but I was never present for it. I couldn’t keep still because I had no self-worth and I learned that from my mum. And I learned that from my grandmother and I learned that from my great-grandmother and so it goes on. And I was trying to tell my boys how amazing they were but yet I was telling them 50% of them wasn’t, because that’s me. That 50% of me, 50% of their father. So, I was lying to them. So, I really do thank universe, God, whoever myself for giving me the MS because I unfortunately had to come from tragedy. I came from tragedy then I went hang on as God and be something bigger than this it’s got to be healing out of this because when you’re hurting and you’re broken inside you do two things. One, you do nothing or two you’re trying to fix everybody else. And I was in such control mood mode that I was so busy I literally didn’t have five seconds to fire. To show me because I had my worth was from helping everybody else. I was, you know, the primary schools, young people’s kid the freaking guinea pigs were better than me. You know, that the dog, the cat, the bird, everything went before me. And when you’re running on adrenalin and self-loathing and pretending to be okay. That shit’s exhausting. So, no wonder I got MS which gave me a massive chronic fatigue, which gave me massive depression, massive anxiety massive everything that you don’t want. But it was literally my soul going, if you don’t listen to yourself, you’re gonna be in a wheelchair. And to be honest I’m really vain and I didn’t want to be in a wheelchair and my beautiful gorgeous husband wiping my ass you know at the age of freaking 44. I didn’t want that to be honest I would rather be dead.
Nick Abregu: Yeah.
Emma Romana: So, what got me on the journey is I just knew there was better I just didn’t know how. And the medication I was on you know medication really works for some people unfortunately, it didn’t work for my body. It’s almost liked a poison and I was getting worse and worse and worse.
Nick Abregu: Well what did they put you on?
Emma Romana: I can’t remember the name, it’s called “G”. Starts with G. Glynnium… Gli… something like. That at least two tablets, one the morning, one in the evening. And I was on heavy steroids like I had to go in every day because I’ve got optic neuritis in my left eye that was the blindness. And heavy, heavy steroids might have to go in a hospital every day and you know get them done intravenously the three hours. I wanted to kill everybody and I wanted to cry and it just really messed with me and then you got a wean off them. And it’s just when for months and it just messed me up. I was drinking very heavily, sneaking cigarettes, eating crap, really massive self-sabotage. Anything for me just to not feel and then it was pretty amazing I was so scared to feel that I became numb.
Nick Abregu: Wow.
Emma Romana: Physically as well as emotionally and then I just wanted this amazing journey to heal myself. And you know, when you’re told that you’re going to be in a wheelchair in six months. You can choose, do I believe it or do I believe that I had the innate ability to heal myself? And I chose myself for the first time and that was a great learning but I’m telling it now, you cannot heal if you’re holding anger, sadness, hurt, pain, fear, guilt, shame, I mean shame that was like home to me. I need everything, you know, that I would wake up feeling ashamed. I would go to bed feeling ashamed, you know, that I wasn’t good enough, I wasn’t this but when you release that in your body, it just leaves so much space to heal and just see who you really are as a person. And then you’ve got to get rid of all those belief systems. They’re not even yours, you know, that they’re the churches, at your school, that the TV’s, their moms, your Aunties, your uncle’s, your grandparents. When you can clear space like that and really do with the conscious mind the unconscious mind and an energy and at a soul level that’s where you’re gonna do your healing. And that’s what I do now. So, there’s my background. That was a long ass freaking conversation.
Nick Abregu: That was the best thing we’ve ever heard.
Emma Romana: Thank you. So, now I just want to go out there and let people stop freaking surviving.
Nick Abregu: Start thriving.
Emma Romano: Start thriving because you’re not here to survive, you’re here to thrive. But you’ve got to pull the crap out that’s not working for you and you’ve got to recognize, or you’ve got to see it. And that’s why I get to travel around the world, see clients all over the world because I created an amazing process.
Nick Abregu: So, one of the things about what you do is it’s… I mean all that’s pretty amazing but it’s that we don’t learn these things in school. We don’t literally… our parents hardly knew. So, most of my ethnic parents and most of my ethnic friends they came from war. They didn’t have time to do all this stuff and we don’t learn this stuff which sucks.
Emma Romana: And fact were actually told to be scared of this because, you know, and we told you know go the normal way just talk about your problems, talk about your problems, about talk about your problems. I can tell you now you can talk about your problem till you’re blue in the face there is no solution in the problem. There’s none! It’s just a problem and you get what you focus on. So, I’m on a massive mission. I’m on a massive mission to let people know there’s something different. Are you brave enough to do something a little bit different and think outside of that box? Because what we’re all doing the norm is not really working for 99 percent of us. If it’s working for some that’s great! And if it’s working for you let it go. Stay with it but is there another thing that you could learn? And I really believe it can be fast-tracked. You don’t need 20 years and then you can drop something. Depression and anxiety is a symptom of the core problem. When we develop, when we look at the core problem, if you sit there and go, I love the s*** out of myself. People who love the s*** out of themselves, they don’t have depression and anxiety, they don’t have disease in the body, they’re not freaking out, they’re not socially awkward, they just go, I love me! This is who I am and you’re go off and you freaking lead it’s amazing life and this is purpose to help other people. Does that make sense?
Nick Abregu: Yeah absolutely.
Emma Romana: Yeah, cool.
Nick Abregu: That’s awesome.
Emma Romana: Thanks.
Nick Abregu: So, we did the video that we recorded and part of it was that you actually did a live session.
Emma Romana: Yeah, we had an amazing guy Dave.
Nick Abregu: Dave as such an amazing guy.
Emma Romana: He was incredible, isn’t he? So, Dave was an incredible guy. He came in, he had been a heroin addict for twenty years. I was sure I think long ago, I think he started when he was 12 and he’s now 40.
Nick Abregu: Started when he was 12?
Emma Romana: Tweleve. Huge! Oh, my goodness. Massive story. Beautiful man. And he came in and he has just turned his life around. And you know what I love about this? Your all-knowing comes from you. Like, if you came to me for a problem, who the hell am I to tell you what you should be doing? I don’t have your background. I don’t have any belief system. I don’t know what you should do. I’ve got my own s*** going on in my own house. I have my own problems. So, for you to release all the problem, or the pain and the emotion living beliefs, you are all-knowing. You know what’s best for you already and that’s what’s different. It’s very empowering, when you can make that decision yourself.
Nick Abregu: Yeah. I was just gonna say, so it’s the empowerment comes from you taking control of the s*** that’s been going on.
Emma Romana: Yeah! Hundred percent.
Nick Abregu: With a little guidance.
Emma Romana: Yes, and that’s all I’ve got to do is to ask you the right questions. That’s it, and let you know that it’s safe to let it go. That’s all it is. Because… that’s why I call myself a self-healing coach. I’m not a healer. Everybody is their own healer.
Nick Abregu: Yeah, you’re the vehicle.
Emma Romana: I’m the vehicle, I’m the one kicking your ass sometimes you know. Sometimes I might swear at you but that’s okay.
Nick Abregu: And I like…
Emma Romana: But in a loving way.
Nick Abregu: Well, I really liked what you did that day…
Emma Romana: Thank you. Yeah.
Nick Abregu: To that guy, it was really… And I like the accountability stuff as well.
Emma Romana: It’s really important, you have to do any kind of work you do in yourself, here’s a top tip for everyone. You must do a massive immediate action. Because we have this thing in the brain called the caudate nucleus and it’s literally our filing system. So, if you can have all, you can sit there and say, “I’m f*** amazing.” If you don’t action it, your unconscious mind will look for that filing cabin and go like, Nope. It’s not. What?
Nick Abregu: You’re not f*** amazing.
Emma Romana: It’s… what? That’s b***. That’s just a word and you throw it back out and just wait till the cats come home. That’s why affirmations only work if you action it. So, even if what I say to most of my clients is if, you know, I’ve gone from hating myself to yeah, I feel I love my submissive feel right. And I always say what about if you stop practicing. Because I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t sit there going, I hate myself to I love myself! That was b***. That’s a lie. I had to learn how because I didn’t know how. People say, “Oh, you’ll be fine once you love yourself. You’d be fine once you get this self-worth.” And I be paying this money, that with my money. I’m like, okay great! Well, how do I do it? Because I’ve never seen it. My mom wasn’t doing it, my grandmother wasn’t doing it, my aunt wasn’t doing it, so what do you do to keep yourself self-love? What do you do to start going, yeah you deserve, you know, what is it? And it could be anything. It could be I’m gonna go to a movie by myself or buy myself a coffee. That’s action. So, now there’s some reference point in there going, yeah do you remember that time you bought yourself a coffee? Remember you went to… you treat yourself to movies? Yeah. So, you do, you’re practicing it. Makes sense?
Nick Abregu: Yeah that’s cool.
Emma Romana: It’s actually a lot easier.
Nick Abregu: I like that. I like it because you have something forward to stick to.
Emma Romana: You have to. You have to have a filing system.
Nick Abregu: There’s not a thought that’s floating around. It’s attached to a certain action.
Emma Romana: Hundred percent! You… whatever you tell your brain, it will preview right. So, whatever your belief systems are, they’ll preview right. Your own thought of mind preview right. So, if you sit there and go, oh I’m really dumb. You deliberately not be at the spell right. You deliberately say stupid stuff because you’re gonna prove yourself right. It’s like me, I have this massive belief system. Get parents sometimes or even lovers and they’ll say ah you know all women are crazy. They would deliberately sabotage or find a crazy woman to prove themselves right.
Nick Abregu: Yeah or find something in that woman.
Emma Romana: Yup. That woman could be five minutes late from something and then that guy…
Nick Abregu: Is always late. Women are always late.
Emma Romana: Yeah, women are always late. Did you know what I mean? You could see your your partner maybe putting lipstick on and you go, uh, you’re always overdoing it! To get me into that, I was jud like, I spent one second to put lipstick, you know, and this is for you. So, we… whatever it is we always prove ourselves right. I had this belief system that my boy, my kids are really freaking awesome kids. And then you can get another mum who could simply go, my boys are trouble, jeez they’re trouble. So, even when Jack and Ben and they, you know, they f*** up. I’ll sit there going, “Uh, they’re just on their journey.” Here another mum who keeps her belief that my kids are trouble, “See? I told you they’re trouble!” Just how you say it.
Nick Abregu: Well, I mean you’ve done something right. That’s for sure because your kids are amazing.
Emma Romana: Thank you. They are.
Nick Abregu: Its proof… proof is in the pudding. Is that the saying?
Emma Romana: Proof is in the pudding. It’s an apple that doesn’t fall far from the tree. What it is, I had to be the leader I had to be the change. So, we’re very good at telling our kids what to do and we’re not doing it ourselves. And when you’ve got a kid like Jack or a young man like Jack, he’s 18 and he is mirror of me so he’s my biggest teacher. He hadn’t let me get away. S*** this kid, right? If I’m lying to myself, he got “Alright, how’s that working for you? What are you what are you showing me now?” And I’m like, “Go away, piece off me. Stop crouching me. F*** off.” Anyway…
Nick Abregu: That’s brilliant.
Emma Romano: Yeah, because he’s a master coach hypnotherapist at the age of 14.
Nick Abregu: Really?
Emma Romana: Yeah, because I were on these massive learning and I was coming home going, “Whoa!” Maybe he’s like, I want to learn to do that. So, he just came on this great journey with me, you know, he’s so cool but I had to be that leader.
Nick Abregu: Yeah, That’s awesome.
Emma Romana: I had to do it you know. And the ripple effect was, you know, I was so ashamed of my body before I started going, yeah, I’m kind of cool. I’m kind of awesome. I taught my youngest son Ben at the age of five, never to wear shorts again.
Nick Abregu: Wow.
Emma Romana: Now he’s 17 and will not show his legs.
Nick Abregu: Really?
Emma Romana: Yup.
Nick Abregu: From your insecurities.
Emma Romana: My insecurity. I gave it to him. So, I can’t sit there, and I say to him and I go, you got beautiful legs! Everyone told me I had beautiful legs too. I didn’t believe them.
Nick Abregu: So, I mean now if you… it doesn’t matter what you say to him because you were the one that instilled that into him. Does that…
Emma Romana: What he has to do now is he has to learn that it’s safe unconsciously because your conscious mind is only 5% of your brain. Your unconscious mind is 95% of your brain. So, 5% you can sit there and go, I know my legs are okay. Why am I doing this? Deep down in the unconscious mind, he has been instilled all the time and time and time.
Nick Abregu: That it’s not okay? Yeah.
Emma Romano: Yeah, so I used to hide my legs and I said to him, “You’ve got your mommy’s legs.” And then he went to school, I think he was… he was seven the last time he wore shorts I think. So, I think he must have been in grade 2 and he got laughed at. So, you say conquer it, conquer it, conquer it. So, you know you gotta be care what we say as his mom, “Oh Ben, telling you just like your mummy. I hate my legs!” I’m telling him that, I mean that’s crazy. I didn’t think of this, you know, you don’t think of it but everyone does it. So, when you become more aware of yourself from like how really important you are, everybody’s important, you know, and my words had such depth and heaviness.
Nick Abregu: Yeah, and because you were the one, he looks for support…
Emma Romana: I’m his mommy. I’m his all and behold, especially from ages to zero and seven. I’m his mom. I’m the love of his life. So, if I sit there and say, this Apple is an orange, he’ll go, “Yep, that’s an orange.” Everyone else is wrong in the world but that’s an orange because that’s where they get their beliefs this was from isn’t it crazy
Nick Abregu: It is. So, I remember when we were recording that I was behind the camera and you said that the subconscious mind is 95% and you said if you don’t believe me, right? Start concentrating on your breathing like what you’re doing.
Emma Romano: Yeah, and you f*** it up.
Nick Abregu: I did f*** it up. I was behind the camera and I was like, (heavy breathing sound). I forgot how to breath.
Emma Romana: Yeah and you think of all your beliefs. So, let’s take it back to Ben who’s had this belief system that he can’t show his legs. He’s unconscious mind is saving him. It’s saving him from being teased. Even though that was when he was seven, the unconscious mind would go, nope, I won’t put you through that again. That hurt, that’s not safe. Did you get me? So that what he needs to do is he needs to go into his unconscious mind and go unconscious minds aside for me to realize this looming belief. It is safe. So, right now the age is 17, with all the hormones going and you know so insecure by his body and his mind’s like, nope. Try me again when you are 25. Try me again another day. Did you get me? Yeah, sorry Ben for f*** you up but I’m trying to unf*** you up, that’s a good job.
Nick Abregu: Yeah.
Emma Romana: And we do have to mess our kids up as well because if you wrap them up in cotton ball, they don’t have those coping mechanisms for when they leave.
Nick Abregu: That’s true. The whole thing about this bullying, I think it’s healthy to a certain extent.
Emma Romana: And you know what, I think bullying has been taken out of concept. It’s like, oh, I got bullied today, why, what happened? He called me fat. That’s not bullying! That’s calling you a name! Tell the person to f*** off. Right? Bullying is when it’s a harmful, physical, harmful something’s happened. You feel trapped and you can’t get out of that situation, you know, and I love going to schools and I love talking to kids about bullying and bullies. You know, if you’ve got a bully up against you, look them in the eye and count to ten but when you look at that kid in the eye, count to ten but look at them with softness not the same way they’re looking at you. Because a bully needs more love than ever before. Because they’re taught to be bullies. Who are they learning it from? Home.
Nick Abregu: Yeah.
Emma Romana: So, if they’re not safe at home, they’ll do everything in their power to feel safe at school.
Nick Abregu: They need to control something. Yeah.
Emma Romana: They have to control it because they’re out of control at home. Does it make sense?
Nick Abregu: Yeah.
Emma Romana: You know, and it’d be added that to teach that to kids, that’s massive.
Nick Abregu: Oh, that’s powerful.
Emma Romana: It’s very, very powerful to teach them why. And how do you how to actually avoid it as well. It’s Incredible.
Nick Abregu: Yeah. That’s cool.
Emma Romana: Yeah!
Nick Abregu: So, now you go around the schools doing that as well?
Emma Romana: Yeah, I’ve been going to school plus I get a lot a lot of families. So, I’m a family freedom protocol practitioner which I teach this as well. I love going into families homes, sitting in there, and you can see all the triggers, you see all the negative anchors, mums voice that pissed you off I can see that! Do you know what I mean? and then you can say to them, oh don’t use that tone, and don’t use that word, you know, use a different word because it all… its gonna is, it’s gonna piss your kid off or whatever on your wife or whatever. And you can actually see the dynamics of the family. It’s fantastic. It’s really good.
Nick Abregu: It’s hard for them to change permanently, right?
Emma Romana: No! Instant.
Nick Abregu: Is it?
Emma Romano: Instant.
Nick Abregu: I mean ongoing, though they might change where you are now with them?
Emma Romana: Instant.
Nick Abregu: Why?
Emma Romana: No. I’ll tell you why. It’s because your unconscious mind will always keep you safe. When you make that decision, when your unconscious mind decides actually it’s safer to change instantly. It’s like a no-brainer but it does take 30 days. So, what happens is you have to repeat this for 30 days. So, say for instance Nick, I say to you, what’s your biggest limiting belief? Go! Come on, what’s your biggest limiting belief?
Nick Abregu: That I can’t exercise in the morning.
Emma Romana: Okay. So, is your unconscious mind ready to release that limiting belief?
Nick Abregu: No.
Emma Romana: Okay, why not?
Nick Abregu: Because it’s comfortable to not do it.
Emma Romana: Yeah. So, how’s it working for you not exercising in the morning?
Nick Abregu: Well not that good. Not that great.
Emma Romano: It’s not great?
Nick Abregu: It’s not great.
Emma Romana: Would you like to change it? Would you like it to be easy?
Nick Abregu: I would like it to be easy.
Emma Romana: Yeah, why?
Nick Abregu: Because it’ll create a better relationship with my partner.
Emma Romana: Ahh, so is your partner more important than you exercising? Yes or no? Quick, yes or no?
Nick Abregu: I want to say no. Because if I’m not healthy then I can’t give to my partner what I need to give.
Emma Romana: That’s right. So, she’s your massive leverage right now. Right? Work on that. So…
Nick Abregu: I’m sweating. You make me sweat.
Emma Romana: My pleasure. You’re welcome.
Nick Abregu: Quick flash shots.
Emma Romana: I know. Well, if you’re thinking about it, you’re conscious.
Nick Abregu: Yeah.
Emma Romana: Your unconscious mind’s all-knowing. So, exercising in the morning can take five minutes. We need to do the stretch I mean like jog on the spot or whatever. So, if your unconscious mind goes yeah, I’m ready to do it, cool. Well what’s your unconscious mind need to know is safely release that old limiting belief. You can exercise in the morning. What does it need to know? Go!
Nick Abregu: That if I do it, I’m gonna be… it’s gonna be a better place.
Emma Romana: Yeah, does that feel safer? A better place than, oh I could be a s*** lover?
Nick Abregu: Yeah.
Emma Romana: They go?
Nick Abregu: Yeah.
Emma Romana: So, you just learned that beliefs. To whom did you learned that belief system from?
Nick Abregu: Well I think my body. I want to say, my body doesn’t feel…
Emma Romana: Dad, Mom, Brother, Sister, Uncle…
Nick Abregu: I guess we’ve never… my family has never been morning people maybe that’s what…
Emma Romana: Oh, there you go! And that’s a belief system. Oh, we’re just not morning people.
Nick Abregu: Yeah.
Emma Romana: Did you get me? It’s a belief system. You’ve just proved yourself right. You start going, hang on, I may not be a morning person but I’m a morning exercise person. All you need to do is five minutes and you feel better about yourself. You do an action. So, what I would tell you right now, get up, do five-star jumps, it’s an action. Yay! I can exercise for less than five minutes, that’s great. And then every single day, whatever you’re learning is for 30 days you’d repeat it. Yeah, I can exercise in the morning, I exercise the morning. Why? Why do we do this? Because at a cellular level, we have seven billion, I think it’s 7 billion trillion cells in our body and they all hold the memory and all hold our belief system. Takes any day to die off a cell. So, every given, you know, day, second or whatever you get a new cell, you’re implementing the new belief system. That’s why what I do is different. You work with the conscious the unconscious at an energy and a cellular level.
Nick Abregu: Wow.
Emma Romana: So, it’s 30 days. 30 days might be a little bit hard…
Nick Abregu: Different change of habit. That’s… I get it. Yeah, yes.
Emma Romana: Yeah, hundred percent. Exactly right, yeah. So, its 30 days. So, for me to change something in the house, my boys used to fight really, really, badly. They’re only like, 12 months and 3 weeks apart. Massive act like, fighting, kicking, screaming so hard and as a mother, you hate it. You hate it right? And I would go screaming and yelling and rant and rant and goes, stop fucking fighting. And they would just go… and then they neither be involved, and I had to change something. So, I got a fart machine. All right, so I would play this fart machine and they would laugh. Now, they’re so anchored to not fighting. That if they start get a little bit and have an argument…
Nick Abregu: They will start laughing.
Emma Romana: Then they will start laughing. And it’s so funny. And I’m like, my job is done. Alright!
Nick Abregu: Thank you, yes. Kiss my hand.
Emma Romana: All you parents out there, you’re welcome. So, it’s just an anti-trigger.
Nick Abregu: Yeah, that’s cool.
Emma Romana: Yeah. But it took 30 days for me to press this fart machine.
Nick Abregu: That’s cool.
Emma Romana: Get me? It’s like, have you got a minute every day to press a fart machine or do you want to handle your kids freaking trying to kill themselves for the rest of their lives.
Nick Abregu: And to be present. You have to… you have to see, you have to acknowledge what’s going on as well.
Emma Romana: Yeah. And you what? For me, I battled with that because I have never been present in my life. We’re always thought about, you know, you have to think about that. Oh, what are you doing tomorrow? What are you doing later on? I was trained really well not to be in the moment. So, what do you want me to say?
Nick Abregu: What will you… what was the last thing?
Emma Romana: That being present.
Nick Abregu: Yes. Yes.
Emma Romana: So, present… being present is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself. And, give to the people around you and your family. Because, it will innately let people feel in their energy field that you are there with them. I had to practice this because I didn’t know what present meant. I didn’t know what it meant because we’re trained to think about the, so, what are you doing tomorrow? What are you doing later? Let’s do this, let’s do that. So, for me, my boys when they were little used to say to me, “Hey mommy, do you want to watch a movie?” And then, I’d be like, “Sure!” We watch a movie. I’d be doing the ironing at the same time and I go to dishes at the same time. And they would be like, “Mommy, watch the movie.” I’d be like, “I am, I’m standing right here. I’m doing the dishes. I’m watching it.” And I’d be arguing with a nine-year-old that I’m watching the movie and they were like, “No, you’re not! I just want you sit here.” Hence why Ben, put his hand on my leg and said, “I love it when you’re sick because you’re still.” You need to be still. So, it’s a practice, right? So, if you go, I just wanna know how to be present. I’ve got a little trick. What I would do if I had to be present with somebody, and I use to find it very hard to look at someone’s eyes. Because I’d be scared that they would look in mine. Because when you don’t like yourself you don’t really want anyone seeing you.
Nick Abregu: Yeah.
Emma Romana: Because I had this big mask on. So, I would stay here, in between your eyebrows. So, If I would get in between your eyebrows right now Nick. It actually looks like my eyes are both staring at your eyes. Instead of the one way or another. Your welcome. Second one is… it’s called 4-4-4-4 and breath in at the count of four. And hold for four and breath out for four and then hold for four. And, that is also a really great tip when you’re starting to go into anxiety or overwhelm? Because overwhelm and anxiety is just fear. It’s a fear about what’s gonna happen. And fear is b*** because fear is an illusion. It’s a what if. You don’t f*** know what’s gonna happen to me anytime, why be so worried about it? What’s with that? And then, we have digital movies in our heads and then and the next thing is we manifest it because we’re focusing on it so much. And then our unconscious mind goes, this is what’s going to happen, and we will create it.
Nick Abregu: Yeah. Yeah.
Emma Romana: So, what if we could do that in a positive?
Nick Abregu: Yeah. I’m notorious for that. If someone gives me half an answer, my brain automatically goes and fills in the rest.
Emma Romana: Yeah. And you fill that in from the rest. From all you past hurts, your past shame, your past anger, past sadness. I mean, I still fall into that. So, if someone says to me, “I need to ring you.” I’m like, oh s***.
Nick Abregu: What’s happening like… oh my God.
Emma Romana: What have I done?
Nick Abregu: You were right.
Emma Romana: It’s straight away.
Nick Abregu: Like, we need to talk?
Emma Romana: Yeah! We need to talk. I’m like… And the worst is, “Can I talk to you tomorrow?” F*** no! Now! Let’s talk. What? What’s going on?
Nick Abregu: That is so… but I’m glad I’m not like that.
Emma Romana: And I think everybody’s like that. Like, why do you hate me? What have I done? They’re all the same. So, that when I thought like hang on, breath in, hold, breath out, hold for 4 times. It just brings you back to your… brings you back to your presence.
Nick Abregu: And, I think if we could bring that to a business sense? I think a good businessperson is someone who resolves the problem or resolves the situation there and then.
Emma Romana: Yes. Hundred percent. I agree with that.
Nick Abregu: And doesn’t take it home.
Emma Romana: I agree with that. So, I believe in my business, I am a… you know, I am a solution person. I help you find solution and I don’t wanna find a solution in weeks’ time or ten years or years time. I wanna do it now. Find it, because we’re led to believe that it takes a long time to find the answer. I call it b***. I call absolute b*** on it. Because, when we were born, we knew the answers. I’m hungry, cry. There’s your answer. If I cry, you just gonna feed me. If I’m bored in bed and I’m a newborn, (makes crying sound) Oh, mommy hi. You got me? I mean that would work. We’ve got the solution.
Nick Abregu: Yeah.
Emma Romana: And then, we’re taught that we don’t know that solution. Adults know better than you. I can tell you right now my kids know me more than I’ve ever known myself. It’s like you, you think of your parents. You know your mom and dad, you know when they’re lying to you, you know when they’re lying to themselves.
Nick Abregu: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Emma Romana: And that s*** you. That pisses you off because you feel like, why don’t you trust me?
Nick Abregu: Yeah, yeah. For sure.
Emma Romana: Hundred percent, right? So, now we got belief system like, maybe people can’t trust me. Maybe I don’t trust my own thoughts.
Nick Abregu: That is the worst place to be.
Emma Romana: Hundred percent, maybe I don’t trust myself in this. So then, you start getting advice from everybody else. And, they are giving you advice from their freaking past. From their past hurts, pains, all that that. Do you get me? And then you’re completely fucked up and that’s when you ring Emma Romano. And then go, Emma, I need some timeline reset please.
Nick Abregu: And also, we have that gut instincts when you get into that trap, you don’t believe you’ve got instinct anymore.
Emma Romana: Yeah. That’s when you just know.
Nick Abregu: You are so f*** at point.
Emma Romana: You are so fucked there. You’ve got instincts. Your first brain is actually your gut brain. And this is your second brain. And you now, this one is a great brain but It’s kind of a bit simple. It minds keeping things simple, your unconscious mind. It’s your 5% conscious mind that wants to complicate everything. You know it’s funny because when people go to this really basic process that has massive change, they go, is that it? I’m like, yup. I’d go, I didn’t even use a hard word. Right? Didn’t even use a complicated word, you know, it’s so basic.
Nick Abregu: We’ve got years and years of filing data that we’ve seen. Not even the things we’ve experienced, maybe just what we’ve seen or heard. All this senses, right? We have all this stored data and when you… when something’s happening, your gut is just like, it’s pulling data from here, from here saying, this happened at this time. This happened at… if we put all of this stuff together, something… just be aware that something bad or something good is gonna happen.
Emma Romana: Yep. Hundred percent.
Nick Abregu: I’ve read that somewhere…
Emma Romana: And I’ve got this massive belief system of this, if something is going to happen, and it goes wrong, or something could be wrong, I would rather deal with it at that time than worry about it for a week beforehand. Because I’ve got other shit to do. I’ve got stuff like, seeing people, travel the world, I’ve got things like make great passionate love to my husband. He’s very hot by the way, and you know, I’ve got…
Nick Abregu: He’s a real man.
Emma Romana: He’s a real man. He’s a very scented real man. Yeah. I am very blessed. F***, you don’t want to know how I won that man.
Nick Abregu: There’s not many real men in the world.
Emma Romana: No there’s not.
Nick Abregu: But you got one.
Emma Romana: I’m like, God. The first, it was a d*** head but that was okay. So, I learned my lesson.
Nick Abregu: That was practice.
Emma Romana: That was practice. The second one was better than the first one. But I did get two amazing freaking boys from my first husband. Thank you. What was I saying?
Nick Abregu: You have a theory that…
Emma Romana: I have a theory. So, what it is, is that I could sit there for a week and worry about something that could happen next week. Or, I could sit there and enjoy my life and deal with the present. And then if something happens, I deal with it there. Because I’d rather deal with something for a day or a couple of hours and maybe a month or six months. If you have the what-ifs, take out the assuming. I started taking, I assumed what people were thinking and doing. I took that out early last year and that changed my world. It’s amazing. All people will sit there go, ahh look I think you’ll do it. How do you know? How do you know what else I’m gonan do? I don’t know what I’m gonna do next five minutes. I don’t even about what I’m up next. I don’t even know what you’re gonna say Nick or do. Do you get me? So, I think being present it’s a great practice to bring on.
Nick Abregu: Yeah, how do you do that? How did you remove the assumptions?
Emma Romana: I still have to work on that every given the second because it’s natural. Oh, what are they gonna think? You told that!
Nick Abregu: Because I think we extrapolate the data of people’s behaviors and we think that people don’t change.
Emma Romana: So, I asked myself really good quality questions. So, this is the thing, we only went with the conscious mind, the five percent when we’re telling it. We’re working with the unconscious mind when we asked the question. So, I ask this, this is what I ask myself, I’ve got this from Julie Robbins. Is it true? That’s what I ask myself and then I usually go, I don’t know. Then what the fuck you are worrying about it for? And that’s it. That’s why I ask myself good quality questions. And as a mom, I used to be a really good mom, but a tyrant one. Now, I’m really f*** amazing mom because I stopped telling my kids what they should be doing. I start at asking them question, what do you need? Jack, on Sunday night was like, “I’m just too angry at everything.” “What do you need?” He said, “I don’t know.” And I was like, “If you don’t know, I don’t f*** know!” Do you need to go for a ride? What do you need? And he goes, “Yeah, I think I need to like, to touch a tree. Well, there is a big tree at the back mate. I’d love to go.” But as a mother, if I said to him, “Go, hug a tree.” He’d be like, “F*** fairly b***, bloody, f*** hippie.” You know what I mean?
Nick Abregu: Yeah.
Emma Romana: He knows what he needs. He’s a young man. As a mother, you wanna tell them what they need but let them figure it our themselves. Does that make sense?
Nick Abregu: Because we don’t want them to hurt the way we did when we made that mistake.
Emma Romana: And how dare us to take that freaking journey from them? Because, if anybody had taken the journey right away from me of having MS, I would sit, and I’ll go, “You asshole.”
Nick Abregu: Yeah
Emma Romana: Because without MS, I wouldn’t be sitting here talking to you. Do you know what I mean? And this is a privilege and honor Nick. And I wouldn’t have that privilege and honor of being at teaching worldwide. And take on clients through.
Nick Abregu: And changing somebody’s lives. Yeah.
Emma Romana: Exactly, I mean look at it every day. Several times a day. It’s huge work.
Nick Abregu: Yeah
Emma Romana: I wouldn’t have that. I’d still be a receptionist at the chiropractic lab. I love that job but that’s not where I was meant to be.
Nick Abregu: Yeah
Emma Romana: I am meant to be helping people at a massive scale and I’m supposed to be helping you by asking you all the good quality questions.
Nick Abregu: You take action, you took actions.
Emma Romana: I am a huge action taker. In fact, I’ll say yes and just kind of work it out later. Yeah, that’s what I do. I go, yes and I go s***.
Nick Abregu: D*** it!
Emma Romana: Nah, I told you don’t talk. Like, far out! You know, it’s like yeah, you need to get out of your comfort zone.
Nick Abregu: That’s brilliant.
Emma Romana: Yeah.
Nick Abregu: Emma, thank you so much.
Emma Romano: My pleasure.
Nick Abregu: For coming on and doing this. It’s been awesome.
Emma Romana: I loved it. Thank you.
Nick Abregu: Ever since we started this podcast, you were the one that I wanted that I had in mind to come on.
Emma Romano: Really?
Nick Abregu: Yeah, because I just knew it was gonna be awesome.
Emma Romana: Is that because I’m funny as f***?
Nick Abregu: And you’re awesome as well.
Emma Romana: Well, thank you.
Nick Abregu: She was awesome, right?
Emma Romana: Thank you, thanks guys. It’s been a privilege, you know. I love it.
Nick Abregu: I’m glad we connected last year.
Emma Romana: Me too. My new students walked in and I was like great guy. And Jack, Jack can spot a great… I have to ask my son Jack on the phone. What do you think? He’s like, “Nope.” He is so freaking funny like, he is so in tuned with himself. And then I said, “If Nick.” He goes, “Good guy.” And I’m like, “Okay. So, we can be friends?” He said, “Yup.” So, when I said I’m doing this podcast with you know, he goes, “Good guy!”
Nick Abregu: You should have brought him. I thought you are going to bring him.
Emma Romana: He’s got a new job today. He’s starting at the McDonalds, he’s gonna go to the intro thing today.
Nick Abregu: We should have him on and see…
Emma Romana: He would love it. He crews with me. So, when I do big workshops, he’s got big freaking burly men yelling at him like he’s their father and stuff. He’s amazing! He’s incredible.
Nick Abregu: That’s awesome. Okay, let’s do this again let’s get him on and then…
Emma Romana: I would love to do this again.
Nick Abregu: Awesome.
Emma Romana: Yeah. It’s fun.
Nick Abregu: Thank you so much.
Emma Romana: My pleasure, thanks for inviting me. This is huge.
Nick Abregu: I hope everyone enjoyed it too.
Emma Romana: Yeah, I hope everyone enjoyed it.